"MAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" Porkchop shrieked enthusiastically, adding to the clamor. "DERRRRRRRR!!!! FAAAAAAAARRRRRRRT!!!!!! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS!!!! FARRRRRT FART FART! CHILLLLLLLDDDD FAAAAAAARRRT GASSSSS!!!!" It had no idea what these words meant, only that it was fun to say, so it just kept on going.
"GAAAAAAaacckkk!" its voice faltered, cracking for a moment. Porkchop coughed. Huh. Ugh, why did its throat feel so BAD!!! It hated it! So, the obvious solution was to scream about it. "GhHRoIREeEEeee—" No, that wasn't making it feel better. It wanted to cry. It WAS crying, practically, just with only wailing and no tears.
"brrrrrarghh," it squealed hoarsely, then returned to gnawing on Chaos-Two's keratin plates.
The piglet squinted, baring its teeth (and gem) in a displeased scowl. "Fart PURPLE!" it complained, as if Vargas' color was some kind of extremely personal insult. (To be fair, it was rather eye-searing in Draco's light.)
"I— I! Grr! I....." It squirmed in Chaos-Two's grip, struggling to expose more of itself in order to look bigger. No one looked DOWN on it like that! "CHOP!" it grunted loudly, in as deep a voice it could. An excellent word, it thought as soon as it left its mouth. Harsh. Vaguely intimidating. Just as it would be.
"CHOP CHOP CHOP! I cHOP! PORK! Chop! PORKCHOP!!!!" Little pink hooves kicked fruitlessly at Chaos-Two's arms and chest. "I'M gonna PORKCHOP YOU! PURPLE," it scoffed again, and dark pink shadows formed under its white pits for eyes. "CHOP YOUR PORK!"
While the grown-ups were talking grown-up stuff, Porkchop had taken to chewing on Chaos-Two again. Now they were quiet, which was not as fun. He spat out a piece of stray fur and looked up at the one holding him.
"YUUUUUL-oh," he squealed, remembering the squishy fruit he'd been given. That was much tastier, and wasn't even furry!
"Squish. Yellllll-ow? Squish! Yum!" He nudged insistently at Chaos-Two's chest with his snout, snorting.
"Yum! Yummy yum PORKCHOP!" That was him now, he'd decided. And now, he would demand a yummy yellow for Porkchop!
Then he squirmed, turning to eye the purple thing that talked too much and wasn't squishy enough.
"CHOP your PORK," he said, in what he probably thought was a threatening tone.
"SHUT. FACE!!!"
@V-Chaos-Two (oh my god i'm so sorry lmfao also i meant
@Vargas )