Jan 13 2016, 03:55 AM
(I'm literally writing this in tears guys)
She couldn't do this anymore.
Cayenne came back to Polaris for what must've been the thousandth time since she'd seen Tenn last, and every time she came he just wasn't here. She searched the garden every time, she searched the tree den every time, the den where they slept and told each other of their love, where she gave him a ring to match her own. And each time she laid there among the soft moss and tried to keep herself together.
Every time she clutched her arms together and rested her head on her knees, hugging herself, trying to keep herself from breaking. Paranoid thoughts of him just up and leaving and never coming back and deliberately avoiding her - they haunted her, they trying to tell her that she was worthless.
Bog didn't love her, she only stole his affection because she saved his life multiple times - she forced him to like her, to be her friend, to reluctantly accept her godawful looks in exchange for her skills. She loved Bog so much, but what other reason did he have to keep her around?
Her sister didn't love her, she loved her mate, that Basil who ran himself into the Eyes and nearly drowned himself. Her sister was only glad of her appearing and saving her, and when she said she thanked her, she was really thanking the All Mother. She loved her sister too, but she knew what she was in Dove's eyes.
She was useful, as a teacher, a savior, a life-support system, but only Tenn had looked at her with the world in his eyes like she was his.
She leaned her head back against the walls of the tree den and stared up, her teeth clenched, her fangs glinting as they ground together, her breath coming ragged through her teeth, her eyes slowly growing blurry with tears until they stung and she had to close them. She couldn't do this anymore, she couldn't be so alone. It threatened to swallow her up, and she just wanted Tenn to come back.
She couldn't do this anymore.
Cayenne came back to Polaris for what must've been the thousandth time since she'd seen Tenn last, and every time she came he just wasn't here. She searched the garden every time, she searched the tree den every time, the den where they slept and told each other of their love, where she gave him a ring to match her own. And each time she laid there among the soft moss and tried to keep herself together.
Every time she clutched her arms together and rested her head on her knees, hugging herself, trying to keep herself from breaking. Paranoid thoughts of him just up and leaving and never coming back and deliberately avoiding her - they haunted her, they trying to tell her that she was worthless.
Bog didn't love her, she only stole his affection because she saved his life multiple times - she forced him to like her, to be her friend, to reluctantly accept her godawful looks in exchange for her skills. She loved Bog so much, but what other reason did he have to keep her around?
Her sister didn't love her, she loved her mate, that Basil who ran himself into the Eyes and nearly drowned himself. Her sister was only glad of her appearing and saving her, and when she said she thanked her, she was really thanking the All Mother. She loved her sister too, but she knew what she was in Dove's eyes.
She was useful, as a teacher, a savior, a life-support system, but only Tenn had looked at her with the world in his eyes like she was his.
She leaned her head back against the walls of the tree den and stared up, her teeth clenched, her fangs glinting as they ground together, her breath coming ragged through her teeth, her eyes slowly growing blurry with tears until they stung and she had to close them. She couldn't do this anymore, she couldn't be so alone. It threatened to swallow her up, and she just wanted Tenn to come back.
@Tennessee
