ORIGIN

Pride listened. The answer sounded reasonable enough to him--a good answer, even. "A good friend, then; and a dangerous enemy, and a wise and intelligent leader." He mulled this over. "I will not ask why you wanted to be king. It does not matter--not really. I suppose everyone might be drawn to some path in life. The question is whether you will allow your desire to become desperation, and to rule you--or if you will put forth the hard work to become that ally, enemy and leader. I would suggest that you ask the rest of your--our--group, what they wish. Desire. If they hold any ideas. To aid another is to earn their loyalty. I think little Lust already holds you in very high regard, and some of the others--the tiny lizard--would not have come if they did not, as well. "

He lowered his head, rubbing his antlers thoughtfully on the rock--an idle gesture, the scratching of an itch as he thought. "That will make you the good friend. As for a dangerous enemy... we must all train, and destroy those who would harm us. Those Bloodberries must be taken out or they may pick off our people--and anyone else within the caves." Pride's tone was one of sombre warning. He didn't doubt for a moment that those damn sadists would do exactly that.

"As for leadership... we were both a little younger, then. I think we are all allowed our mistakes, when learning. The question is--will you learn from them, or repeat them." He shook his antlers a little, and peered back to Envy with humor in his eyes. "You don't need to prove yourself to anyone, if you already know the potential that you hold. If you must learn it... give yourself time. Do not run into death's embrace again to try and prove it. You had no one to prove anything to but yourself, Envy. You needn't prove you are better than Blackberry--you already know as much, do you not..? Better than she, and her entire band of misbegotten misfits?"

Pride peered curiously back at Envy.

"I was already risking enough by merely wanting my fur back. That was an insult. That, was an insult," he repeated, his voice holding a sharp edge of anger to it even now--tempered, at least, by the passage of time. "We had to show them that they could not harm us, and walk away with what they wanted. But words..? Words are nothing. Their words were their own frustration. Do you want to see what happened as I saw it, and felt it?"

Pride peered at Envy, one ear flicking. His gaze was intent, strong; he certainly detested the malformed goose and her lot, moreso for what they'd dared to do to Envy. "When they called you a rat, they were insulting me. They were trying to call me down by calling you, my ally, my friend, disparaging names. You have my answer by way of my actions--I ignored it. If you wish to see it through my eyes, I can show you, mind to mind. If you do not, that is all right as well."

It occurred to him, even if briefly, that Envy--if influenced by Blackberry somehow--might refuse the link. He might, after all, see something through it that they did not want him to see. But he dismissed this fleeting thought as unlikely, and continued with an offer--

"In fact, regarding magic, bring them to me whenever you wish and I will teach them freely. I am confident that I could kill any of those creatures with ease, at least one on one; I have ideas of my own, about magic, and I have spoken to others who research it and its... origins, uses, and so forth. I think I could train your kingdom into a magical army, given time."

Pride watched Envy in complete, detached silence for a very long while. His mind was rather blank; he simply stared, letting the weasel vent their frustration, their anger. Let them come back to themself a moment, and perhaps the silence will frame their words more clearly.

At length, delicately, as if afraid to upset a pitcher plant brimming with water, he spoke.

"First of all... I did not know that they had taken your tail. I suggest we take it back." He then paused, watching Envy for a moment more, still detached in tone and bearing.

"Secondly... Calling you a rat is hardly a 'tragedy' either, my King. They tried to insult me, Envy, but the point I am trying to make to you is that it is only an insult if you consider it to be one. Think of it this way..." He eyed Envy closely, considering. "What would you say if I told you that you are far too ridiculously bright blue? Quite silly, really; no one has any business being so blue!" He added insult to his tone with this, though it was light mockery more than anything--harsh, perhaps, to someone with low self-esteem... but the insult itself was, of course, complete nonsense. "Water ought to be blue. Being so blue--why, it is utterly ridiculous!"

He then paused, eyeing Envy curiously. Were they so defensive that they would take offense at a completely false insult..? Or were they, at least, above this nonsense?

Pride stared, for awhile, his patience beginning to fray at the edges. He did not like self-defeat, or self-pity. He grunted.

"I know a pup who blew her leg nearly off shortly after hatching. She was unable to hunt for herself--even to walk--and spent every day in incredible pain. She did not complain--she bit it back. I am not saying you are poor at handling it; I thought you strong when we met. I am saying that 'hardships' are what you make of them."

He paused for a moment, staring at the weasel. "Regardless, that wasn't the point I was after making. My point was that it is not the insults that bother you. It isn't the words. It is a fear, I think, that you are lesser, and that you must always prove to others that you are not. Nothing can help that, perhaps, except age, experience--perhaps not even then. I did think about how you must have felt. Insulted, outraged, yes? Hurt and angry. You wished to lash out and prove their words wrong through violence. But imagine..."

Pride shifted position, staring. "Imagine that you had left, with me? Imagine how angry they would have been... and with nothing to spend that anger on? They would have remembered you, Envy, as the one that taunted them, stole from them and got away with it. They would have hunted you in a rage. You would have been the 'damned pirate weasel King' that their whole troupe could not defeat. Instead you allowed your fear of inferiority to make you inferior. But I am not here to tell you what you can and cannot do."

He rose up, abruptly but smoothly, careful to stare as closely as he could to Envy, so that--again--this last and most solemn point was made. His tone, though, was sombre and sincere. "I offer you the advice--and the training of others, the sharing of my mindset and so forth--as your ally... and because you are my King. Regardless of what you may think of yourself, I intend to follow you, as promised. What you do with the words I give you--well, that is your decision to make. My loyalty will remain in place regardless."

Envy gritted their teeth, hating the feeling of Pride chiding them as he would a small and indolent child. They turned their gaze away, and grunted as he told them about the dog. They had struggled- they hadn't eaten since almost their emergence, and they hated how everyone else could. And even now, they still felt occasional waves of nausea. They nearly died every few hours when they needed nourishment again! Pride didn't know how it felt. He'd never seen the worst of their struggles and he never would!

They looked up, listening with a little bit of gratification as Pride acknowledged how they must have felt- but then went on to talk about how they felt lesser- how that was the underlying cause. They clenched their jaw- it was true, of course. "I... I..." They twitched their quills. "It's everyone else who thinks that. I'm the one who has to keep proving it." They felt cornered, ironically like a rat in a trap. Every turn they took, Pride pinioned them with words and calm logic and Envy wished that he'd just yell at them so they could feel angrier about it, rather than the shame and humiliation of being called a fool by one of their own subjects. They knew if they protested, Pride would only pinion them with more words.

But Envy was a king! Surely that was impossible! Envy should be in charge here! They could always fly away? But no, that would mean giving up. They shouldn't be clinging to his back, simply seething and letting him beat them down! No! They were a king!

...But Envy wished they were the damn weasel pirate king. They shook their head, finally lifting their gaze to meet Pride's silver stare. Dying had gotten them so much more, they realized, shaking their head so that their quills rattled. "But I... I can be that now. Now I'm even better. I have spikes, and... more spikes, as well. Besides, when they're dead, it won't matter what they think anyway, but I can keep this." Envy managed to overcome the hollow rage seething inside them and appear cooler- thinking about what they had gotten helped. They didn't care; they were a king now. A thorny, spiky king. And maybe soon they'd be a weasel-pirate king. Next time. They let out their anger in a sigh, thinking about what could have been and growing jealous of the self that didn't exist.

"I can do it next time. Even all of them couldn't take me down."

Pride's motion shook them out of their momentary lapse of attention, and they were about to protest, but stopped themselves. If Pride gave them the opportunity- which he no doubt wouldn't- Envy could protest later. Or, Envy could give him the silent treatment. But Envy didn't want to ignore Pride. They liked having the white stag around- feeling noble and strongest when they were perched atop his head. Pride was more regal than any throne, and he was theirs.

They paused as Pride offered to train others for them, and the sharing of his knowledge and advice. Although, Envy planned to stick by the stag, for most of it. They preferred the idea of Pride being near them most of the time. Didn't much like the thought of him spending time with others. But if it was necessary to keep the kingdom together, Envy supposed that they'd begrudgingly allow it, so long as his king took priority. Finally, they nodded. "Good."



When I speak.

When I think.



________________

@Pride