Pretty Good Madness - Printable Version

Kalama had plodded into tunnel P, in the rare moment when she wasn't training Kalaziel, and he was asleep. Hopefully they stayed asleep. They didn't want their miniature champion running off. Not when she had important business to do. She shook the sand from her feathers, and scanned the tunnel, hot wind buffeting her.

"Collector!" She screamed into the wind. "Where are you! I want stuff!"

Kalama wasn't sure the Collector was here. But last she'd seen, he'd been here, working on that trial stuff with Vargas. The stuff that was rigged. She was sure of it. She should've won from the beginning. Kalama switched from foot to foot, doing a hot-footed dance. The sand burned her claws. She padded within a cool divot of the tunnel. The sound of the hot Hydra wind was muffled here. Waiting for the collector to show up, if at all. She tucked her beak into her wing. Preening her feathers to take her mind off how annoying having to wait was.

think "speak"

The call came from behind: back from Canis, where the Collector actually dwelt. Most days, at least. He'd seen the angry chicken wander through and wondered. Her exploits of late had... potential.

He liked that.

She'd made a horrific child-spawn. She'd also fought Orthoclase-Alpha. So his voice was dripping sweet as he spoke. "Ahh, Champion Kalama," he called. "Back here, please." His voice was smooth and crooning, but a little distant, behind her.

When she arrived she'd find him carefully "tending" the shrine-like piles on the Canis entrance, settling a piece of armor in among the rest.

Kalama had been looking the other way. Expecting The Collector to come around a bend in the tunnel. But it was from Canis. Champion. The collector had called her champion. Finally, someone respected Kalama's title. Vanity fanned, Kalama trotted back to the entrance to tunnel P.

She barely gave the shrines a glance, though her eyes lingered on the piece of armor for slightly longer. Interpreting the piles the collector futzed with was well beyond her level of intellect and care. She wrinkled her nose at it, as best one could with a beak.

"Whats all this? " She shook her head. "Well, never mind that. Collector am I glad to see you. All these other gembound suck. Except for the one I made. You're not a gembound, are you?"

She tilted her head."Well, everyones a gembound, I guess. You know, you're the only one that respects me. The only gembound. The Bonebound kicked me out after i'd done nothing-nothing! Well I tried to beat up Aure, but how was I supposed to know that they all liked Aure? If I don't like Aure, I dont think anybody should.

"Im right. I mean, I'm usually right. I cant remember a time I wasnt right. Anyways, I think they knew I'd be a better leader. I think they were all conspiring against me. And Imp--that fuck stupid flying alligator thing was there. He turned against me. Yeah, me! I'm his rival! Me!

"After we'd survived Hydra together--though I could've done it on my own. Oh and by the way, that trial was rigged. How was I supposed to kill one big worm? I-I mean I could've. But everyone else there couldn't have. They weren't strong enough. But I am. I was the first to fight it."

Kalama paused for a breath, and then continued. "But anyways, I want to get back at them. All of them. I want something that makes me strong. Or something that would, like, destroy stuff they like. Or trash their homes and leave 'Kalama Was Here' on the cave walls. You can do that, right? I don't know what they like. Maybe shrink Imp's head to the size of a pea, too. That'd be funny."

think "speak"

Well. This was... a mouthful. An earful; two ears' full. The Collector listened, trying to pick meaning from the madness but that was like trying to pluck a needle from a far-too-large haystack.

He suppressed a sigh. The only thing he managed to interject, right at the start, was "Hm, no, I'm not what you'd call a 'gembound.'" Nothing so... accidental; so crass, no. He'd had purpose. And Kalama was an excellent tool for that purpose, in fact.

But... she was blunt, and half the caves had seen her attack the Bonebound. What could he ask of her-? Ahh. Yes--that, or that... he had a few ideas.

He tuned back in. She was still yammering on about Aure, and now about Imp. He waited, patiently, a thin smile on his face beneath the shadow of the hood and at last, when she had finished, he swept into a low and respectful bow.

"Alas, Champion, you are one-of-a-kind. There have been many champions--you see some of their remains here, on this wall," he added, a gentle gesture indicating the shrines. "Unlike them, you still survive. Now... usually," he went on, tone crooning, "I assign a single task, for a reward, but in your case, I offer you choices."

Robed arms swept out, palms up expansively, as he listed Kalama's options.

"Find this 'Imp,' and kill him, and return to me his skin. It bears special properties, and from it I will create an armor that will allow you to keep fighting, to keep inflicting chaos and violence, far beyond your normal capabilities. Something... enchanted, magical."

A finger lifted, to tick off a first digit on the other hand, and then a second; "Kill one of the Bonebound, instead; and tell the rest of them that one of the other groups has taken you in. The Children of Rot, perhaps, or the so-called 'Seven'--it matters little which. It's about time they were tested for their strength, Kalama--a strength like yours--rather than left to cower in darkness. In return for this act, I will grant you an item that glows in the presence of living beings. It would allow you to hunt your prey, or avoid your enemies, with ease."

"Alternatively, there is an item lost in Hydra. It was lost during an ancient test, and you would need to spill the blood of a Gembound--no Lesser, either--over its pedestal to retrieve it. A great deal of blood, I'm afraid. But do this, and the item is yours: it would lend searing flame to each strike of your talons or... your spur." He gestured, ticking off the third finger. "That is what I have to offer you; if you wish the third, I will direct you on how to find it."

Kalama listened. She didn't think too much over the Collector not being a gembound, except that it was kinda weird. But the Collector knew her worth. That was all that mattered. She enjoyed the Collectors admission. She was the best champion.

The only one to survive. The only one worth caring about. The Collector even had special things for her to do. Her! Only her! But as she listened, the Collectors demands got dark fast. She wasn't expecting that. The Collector wanted her to kill. She hadn't--didn't even know if she could. She backed up a step, beak parted.

"Woah--I can't kill people! Eythan said..." She trailed off. Eythan was one of the Bonebound. One of the many in the group that had betrayed her. And who was she to disappoint the Collector? He was right, they needed to be tested. Develop their strength like she had. If...if the champions that came before her could kill, so could she.

"Alright. I'll kill one of the Bonebound, maybe. Say the Seven or the Children of Rot let me in." Kalama said.

It felt off somehow, but the Bonebound were off. Wrong. And it'd put them in another war. A war she could participate in, hopefully. The Collector was doing this for her benefit, after all. Or maybe she could just hurt someone in Hydra. She could survive Hydra twice. And that way no one would have to die. No--the Collector would think her a coward then. And Kalama was not a coward. She was a champion, like the Collector said.

"I can't kill Imp. I wont have a rival if he dies. But I'll kill a Bonebound. All they do is sniff bones, thats easy enough to deal with." She nodded to herself.

think "speak"