A tiny red carpet unfurls, rolling and rolling and rolling until it creates a long, extravagant walkway; it is bordered by glimmering round lights, some that line its edge, and some that bob weightlessly in the air. All of a sudden, too many instruments start blaring an ear-shattering fanfare—one familiar with Mendelssohn's Wedding March might recognize it. At the crescendo of each part, pops of confetti littered the air and sparkling fireworks bloomed.
And to this fanfare, hovering down the aisle like an exalted monarch, came Nemean. She was adorned with highly reflective, gem-studded gold embellishments: a crown, bracelets, and rings. A shiny gold medal lay against her chest, looped around a thick red cloth that extended into a cape fit neatly around her wings so that she retained the ability to buzz about like a gnat—
"HEY!" she blurted, snatching the microphone from the narrator and sentencing them to dea—... that is, dear retirement.
THAT'S RIGHT! IT'S ME! IT'S
ME THIS MONTH! I'M THE [
she checks an index card] —
I'M ALL THE THINGS OF THE MONTH! You know, you guys NEVER appreciate me, and it's ABOUT TIME.
SO LISTEN UP!
[
she taps the medal with a claw, leaning the microphone in so everyone can hear ]
FOR OUR
MEMBER OF THE MONTH, IT'S ME,
NEMEAN! After ALL THE WORK I put into this STUUUPID bee event, and you know WHAT! You guys probably expect something REALLY COOL for our AWAKENING ANNIVERSARY BUT MAYBE YOU DON'T DESERVE ANYTHING! Oh yeah, you want all the nice free loot that you normally get? WELL MAYBE I TOOK IT ALL!
Moving ON, for our
CHARACTER OF THE MONTH, you guessed it,
ME! You can NEVER put me down and out for good, I will ALWAYS COME BACK! And you know, it should go without saying but I DO MORE THAN YOU DESERVE!!!! I mean let's be real, I do it MY way, but that's not a BAD WAY! OKAY!
Would you know it?
PAIR OF THE MONTH, ALSO ME. Well, and Chadsworthington Stevenson the Third, my loyal and ever-faithful companion. When you all abandoned me, CHADSWORTHINGTON WAS HERE. When I was recovering from DYING, CHADSWORTHINGTON WAS HERE. When I had to make little hats for bees that only a few people appreciated, CHADSWORTHINGTON WAS HERE!
[
she pats the top of the golem's head. it is fashioned with a new, sparkly and gem-studded bow for the event ]
SHUT UP ISRA I SEE YOUR MOUTH OPENING DON'T YOU DARE!
ANYWAY!!! THREAD OF THE MONTH? DO YOU GUYS EVEN UNDERSTAND HOW UNCOOPERATIVE BEES CAN BE!? So of COURSE thread of the month is MINE,
BEE MINE! And it says here I share some of the spoils of this reward to these participants so THAT'S FINE. They know greatness when they see it, so THANK YOU.
THANKS FOR NOT VOTING, ALSO. It afforded me this wonderful opportunity to finally get the RECOGNITION I DESERVE. Ahem, that is to say, thank you all for understanding my importance, and I look forward to bestowing lots of worthle—worthy gifts upon you. MAY WE ALL PROSPER AND SURVIVE!
Monthly Draw
 | ʡ 500 |  |
Congratulations to ME on winning the Monthly Draw! I WON IT, I DON'T EVEN NEED THESE THINGS BUT I'M GOING TO CHOOSE ALL THREE. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!
With this mutation slot I'm... well I don't know what this is for. Junk. This magicka is peanuts but whatever, I'll take it 'cause it's mine. But with THIS! THIS GEMSTONE... it is BRIMMING with life. I am going to make the BEST thing out of this, my WINNER'S STONE!
THANK YOU FOR ATTENDING THIS VERY IMPORTANT CEREMONY. I am going to lavish myself with these gifts and ALL of the magicka that comes with these titles. YOU ARE ALL TOO KIND. LOVE YOU.
MWAH.
[
she flutters away blowing lots of kisses with her paw: mwah, mwah, mwah! ]
