"What can I say?" He tried to make it humorous but there was no humour to be had and instead it came out dry and hollow. What was he to say? That he was too cowardly to murder another being? That he was all talk and the only time he'd actually killed someone was through circumstance. Not because he had actively sought to kill. All he had done was bring about the inevitable for the little sheep. Something so pure and innocent didn't deserve to live where it would surely be chewed up and spat out by some larger creature. That was his justification anyway, but it was in finding a justification that made him more mortal and connected in a world he tried to separate himself from. Relaxation wasn't something he would say he was feeling, mostly that he was too tired to actually try and pick himself up and retaliate. Just something he had to play off. Only reason he was so exhausted was due to getting deeper into the world that wanted nothing more than to eat him.

All he chose to do was remain quiet as she spoke. Denying that they were similar despite them both sharing an element. But prokaryote was more than any other element. No other element required calling upon other beings to execute it. That was why Louie felt he could relate to what each was feeling. Everyone who had a paw in this world was suffering the most. That was how he had always seen it, that was how he bore his magic. "Sometimes there is no choice. Just as we feed so too do the amoeba and organisms that we control. Can I safely say that I'm in control of what they do all the time? No. As for putting effort into torture... I can't say I'd do it senselessly but then you yourself consider what I'm doing to you to be torture. You were also a stranger to me then."

Why the fuck would you bring that up again?

Kicking himself, he wasn't sure how to recover from that and instead waited for her to pass her judgement. "I don't want you to think that all I am is a monster. I'm not that, at least not yet. For now I hope we can just work together? Look I'm asking a lot of you." Heck yeah he was. He wouldn't even mention he was considering severing the tie. That would be dumb and for this to work he needed her close.

"DO NOT FORGET WHO I AM"
"DO NOT FORGET I AM IN YOUR HEAD"

table by lisa

@Penelope

There he went again. Opening his damn mouth and inserting his back foot like it was tasty. What did she care of his micro creatures? So what if they needed to feed? What did that have to do with Dia's deeds? What did it have to do with anything? She shook her head, but chose to remain silent through every last word. Penelope flopped over onto her side and began to roll, scratching unreachable itches while covering herself in the thin layer of dust that coated the ground.

There wasn't so much as a peep. Not about his stupidity in mentioning his doings to her, not about his claims of being something other than a monster, not about the admission that he was asking a lot from her. Nothing.

As Penelope settled onto her side, her legs and feet thudded against ground. A deep inhale lifted up her side, the sigh given upon the exhale causing the final little stir of dirt. What was she suppose to say? The racking in her brain from this conversation was frustrating her, so she decided to push it all to the depths of her mind, locking it away into little glass bottles. It was time to cut to the chase. With a big grunt, she heaved all 600 pounds up from the ground and stared toward Louie. Toward him, but slightly over him.

"You have yet to tell me what exactly you're wanting from me. From my powers. What do you want from me?"

---

"Speech"
Thoughts.
Louie's Bullshit.
@Louie

Awkward silence followed and he had to say that he felt quite out of place. Deciding it was an appropriate time to roll, she was on her back wriggling and he just shuffled sideways so as not to get knocked by one of her flailing limbs. As he gazed out onto Monoceros, he found himself contemplating empty thoughts. There was nothing positive to think, so he thought of nothing. When she had finished, settled herself down again and spoke, he started at the peace being broken.

"What do I want? You're Arcane... You can see in dimensions and perceive of things I can't begin to imagine," there was heavy admiration in his voice. If he could consciously choose what element his stone provided, he would have picked the most powerful. "... I want someone to be there in my dreams. That is, if you have the skill to do such as that. I'm going to be undertaking a huge task and I need someone to help buffer it. Help buffer the thoughts and feelings as they come every night." A shrug of his shoulders and he mumbled, "Basically, I'm asking for someone to be there to hold my paw as my body tries to tear itself apart. My mind is already fragile... I can't even imagine what undergoing this will do to me." Still, he left the details of what he wanted to do hanging.

"DO NOT FORGET WHO I AM"
"DO NOT FORGET I AM IN YOUR HEAD"

table by lisa

Blah blah blah... he muttered the obvious. She was indeed Arcane and she knew from the start that his interest was held there. However, his tone took her aback a little. Did he admire this skill that much? It seemed so. Something she hadn't actually picked up on until now. All she could do was blink as he spoke, making a request to utilize one of her very first learned spells. Once more, the herbivore scoffed as he said, That is. if you have the skill...

"Actually, I do have that skill. I have to admit, Louie, I'm a bit amuse that you're exposing yourself to me like this. So be it, though. I can Dreamwalk. It was one of my first abilities," she said with a touch of pride. "In fact, if you're tired enough, we can get to it right now."

---

"Speech"
Thoughts.
Louie's Bullshit.
@Louie

Everything had quietened down. No longer was he trying to vomit up the bugs that lived beneath him. Trying to make a demonstration of himself and ultimately put fear into the heart of someone he needed. Louie sighed where he lay feeling pretty exposed. Curling in on himself to remove his most vulnerable assets from view with his skin flushing hard. Penelope was amused by his nakedness and his skin only burned hotter despite his head still swimming and the butterflies in his stomach raging.

"We can begin now..." Truthfully he wasn't sure what to expect, but his energy was depleted and he probably would've fallen asleep without invitation. Head being placed on the ground, he was quick to slip into unconsciousness.

---

Dreams were certainly where to comprehend, Louie found himself standing in Eridanus. No sign of injury as his unmarked body glittered in the warmth and glow of the stones around him. He felt so much lighter, he was happy and he didn't have to worry. His brain was giving him peace where in his life he suffered through his conscious need and drive to be better.

Booker was standing a way off.

Immediately the fox called out to the man, but instead the numbat ignored him. With a shake of his head, the marsupial disappeared into the foliage and he was plunged into darkness as the light left him. Tears stung behind his eyes as he recalled his emergence. His imperfect fix.

"...then please, just. Don't hurt me anymore. Please.".
"I won't Booker, I promise. I'm sorry"
"You've said those words before and you lied. Every apology from you is a lie."
"Please. I just want to be happy."
"You don't deserve to be happy. Isn't that what you said?"

There was a sickening laugh and Louie dropped onto his belly, his paws over his ears but the voices wouldn't stop. A giant mushroom forest sprung up around him. White caps. Their powder deadly but their appearance innocent. Again Booker walked out, behind him the dragon. Both were laughing as they embraced, before Baratheon consumed the man the blood lust evident in his eyes. A paw was felt on his hide, and Louie turned to see the Priest.

"Booker?"
"Yes my child?"
"I love you Booker. I always have."
"But I never loved you."

The fox descended into sobs.

---

Louie was twitching and writhing as he dreamed.

"DO NOT FORGET WHO I AM"
"DO NOT FORGET I AM IN YOUR HEAD"

table by lisa

@Penelope

As he announced they could begin, she reached deep into herself - into her gem - and pulled forth her power. Dreamwalk was an exhausting spell, but it was something she adored. Dreams still held strong as her passion, although she never did spend any time speaking of them. Perhaps this could be something she started to do with Louie, but now was no time to wrestle with the idea. As soon as he was out, she called upon her spell, the sugilite glowing bright purple.

---

It was like waking up into a new world. Opening her eyes was like being reborn, as the green surrounded her like a piece of some magical fantasy land. The feeling of a pounding heart caused the tapir to shudder while eyes stared widely at the world around her, being thoroughly caught up in being able to see as if she'd never lost her sight in the first place. The need to spring forward and bounce like a toddler grasped her, but was immediately diminished as Louie's voice called for her attention through another's name.

Who was Booker?

Voices whispered about, barely audible to Penelope. She took a few steps forward to Louie as he collapsed, stopping dead in her tracks as a loud laughter echoed the walls of the fox's mind. Suddenly, a giant mushroom sprung into the air from the ground, startling her. What the hell was going on? The wonder continued as the other creature came out of nowhere, Louie and he conversing very briefly before she watched the twisted fox turn into sobbing mush.

Penelope's heart sank, the euphoric feeling her sight gave her fading. Then, a rage she'd come to know rose itself up, but for once, it wasn't Louie who made her feel this way. She bolted forth, galloping toward the two figures. The movement caused various brushes to be snapped and toppled over as her mass pushed through them with ease. Her halt was sudden, having her loom over the crying fox while renewed eyes glowered at the dreamscape numbat. What could she possibly do, though?

"Louie?" Penelope called to him, lowering her head down and nosing him with her trunk, her old self emerging to show a tapir that could have been. "I'm here to help, but I don't know what you need me to do."

---

"Speech"
Thoughts.
Louie's Bullshit.
@Louie

Dream land was a place that was supposed to be a solitude. It varied between being his prison and his utopia and tonight it had decided to torment him. Behind him, he could hear Penelope as she galloped on soundless hooves. The numbat in front of him swept away like sand as he turned to look at the ungulate with mucus and tears staining his fur. In here he was everything that he couldn't be out there. Weak. Afraid. Loving. While he wanted to feel anger at letting Penelope see him this way, he only felt grief.

"Penelope..." He sniffled violently and picked himself up off the ground. Now with her here, a mind that was not fabricated, his visions were struggling to manifest. Louie could feel no physical pain here as long as he didn't will it to be, but his emotions were running wild. "I don't know how I expected you to help..." But it was working, whatever he had thought she could do she was doing invisibly. In the back of his mind, the voices fought but as long as his attention was on her, he didn't let them come forth.

"Talking to you seems to be keeping them away... The fears and the sadness." There was no snarky inflection to his voice, only sadness and exhaustion. A smile crept onto his face, "Are you happy to just talk? Maybe there will be more for you. I'm not entirely sure." Darkness surrounded them both and as they sat within the void, the only source of colour and light was from the pair. Yet there were no shadows off either of them.

"Booker was a friend... I thought I could be with him but I can't..." A long drawn out sigh, "No matter how many good deeds I perform, my past sins cannot be erased. Forever I have to walk this path... I've committed to it. I hope only that it ends in the same destination." Did he really need to be so heavy and cryptic with a woman he had just met. Without realizing, he found himself leaning up against one of her sturdy legs as he stared out into the blackness.

"DO NOT FORGET WHO I AM"
"DO NOT FORGET I AM IN YOUR HEAD"

table by lisa

@Penelope

Honestly, this wasn't at all what she could have ever expected. She could see again, even if it was someone else's vision of the world. Among things she could see was Louie. Eyes gazing upon him for the first time in her life and, truly, he was beautiful. Even in the mess of a state, it was something to behold. Red fur and a face of emotions. Two things she couldn't have imagined. Every word that he said made her gut flop, but not like that dream-felt touch of him pressing against her foreleg. She stood like a statue, watching him.

This wasn't actually Louie, was it? Did she foul up and Dreamwalk someone else? Herself? No... she couldn't dream this, not at all. This didn't make any sense and her head was spinning out of control with wonder at what kind of place she was in. She swallowed hard as the words finally sank in, registering in her mind and the realization - that yes, this was definitely Louie - settled in. He was fucking hopeless, wasn't he? Still she nuzzled his fur, trying to not get too distracted by the way it felt.

"I'm not sure how you come to such conclusions about life. Past things can be left in the past. Who you were then is never who you are now. People change and we all have choices..." she said slowly. Was this helpful, or would this only make things worse? She heaved a sigh, feeling a bit frustrated again. Eyes lifted up into the familiar void, finding a calm in her mind without the sensory overload.

"Louie, look at what I have and have not done. Look at what my life has become. These things don't make people evil or set them on a specific path. You don't get handed destinies, you get handed life- realities. I don't know... I don't know everything and I don't know your story, but it seems like you're blowing your entire life out of proportion so you can have a vendetta. Get over it."

Did that really just come out of her mouth? Yes, it did, and as it all slipped over her tongue it became easier to do and now she stood there, face as emotionless as she had always imagined Louie's. Was this who she was letting herself become? She prayed to herself that it was not so, that she was only giving the bastard a taste of his own bitter medicine. Who was she to say, though, that she was right or wrong, helping or provoking?
Life.

---

"Speech"
Thoughts.
Louie's Bullshit.