The Piano wheeled itself smoothly along the dry mud paths weaving through the Room of Bones. It did not rush, nor drag, but moved with dignified purpose, as a piano should. When it had reached a position it deemed central enough in the room, it braked to a halt and propped up its lid to full stick.

It wanted to be heard, and well.

It announced its presence with a descending series of ominous, crashing chords that had the bones near it vibrating and cave mice running from their shelters with fear. Its damper pedal was depressed, such that its strings would keep ringing with the sonorous sound even after the keys had bounced back to their original positions. It waited a full minute for the sound to fade away. Then it called out once more, with another set of crashing chords, this one imitating the cadence of Gembound speech.

"I HAVE COME TO SPEAK WITH THE ONE CALLED THE COLLECTOR. IS HE HERE?"

The Collector flinched--which was not easy to do--in his little hidden hidey-hole. The sound that announced The Piano's arrival was an utter cacophony, an insult to the ears, a sin to all composers who had ever lived on any world.

He wondered, for a beat, what this sound was--until it began to resolve into something almost resembling speech.

When he appeared before The Piano--stepping swiftly out from behind a rock outcropping and striding forward--it was with his head canted to one side and an intense stare that spoke of his full interest.

"That," he announced, stepping closer, "would be me." Crimson pinprick eyes ranged swiftly over The Piano's lines and wood, the ivory and any visible strings, as The Collector made his assessment. "Although I do request that, now that I am here... your voice is kept a little lower," and two claws raised to pinch a bit of invisible air in indication.

He stepped a little closer, reaching out, daring to attempt to run fingers along the smooth keys.

"A fascinating contraption," he murmured, as he did so. "Form and function, a tool of art given life. How interesting. Tell me, my orchestral friend, what is your name--and what might I do for you today..?"

@The Piano

The Collector's intense attention was noted with no small amount of satisfaction. The Piano enjoyed when others could appreciate its complex, majestic form. "Of course," it agreed easily to the Collector's request, and its lid was rapidly lowered to half stick.

If The Piano could preen at the Collector's words, it would have. Instead, a shimmering major chord rang out from its highest strings, as if they had been plucked like a harp. "My name is [piano sounds]," it informed the Collector, ending its sentence with a rustic, pastoral-sounding arpeggio run in its treble range and a few impressionistic-sounding chords. If the Collector was quick, perhaps he would be able to memorize its name by watching which keys rose and sank while it was speaking. "Formally. More informally, [piano sounds]," and a collection of seemingly-random chords in the middle range whose cadence resembled speech, but couldn't quite be made out into words. And then, because it was in a good mood: "I did indeed come with a request, but I see that you are a Gembound of culture, Collector. That is a rather admirable trait in these days. Before we get to business, would you like to play something--?"

If the Collector tried to gauge its intentions, he would find that The Piano was completely sincere in its invitation, with no intention of trying to bite him whatsoever. A rare thing for it. Indeed, if he accepted its invitation, it would even lift the lid to full stick for him to play.

The Collector eyed The Piano, for a moment.

Then, he cleared his throat, and attempted to replicate its name with his own voice. The result of his attempt was quite close; not perfect, however, and he shook his head and smiled apologetically beneath the hood. "Ahhh... How terribly frustrating--and yet admirable--it must be, to have a language all your own. And one so pleasant to the ears."

To its offer, however... Crimson pinprick eyes widened with delight. "Could I..?" he asked, sounding pleased. He reached behind himself, drawing an old and battered chair of dark wood seemingly from nowhere. Then he drew closer in a swish of black robe, seating himself quite close to the keyboard. Whether he was unaware of the danger, or showed no caution for other reasons, he did not quite reveal.

"I believe this one was not quite designed for piano," he informed, threading clawed fingers together and turning them away, cracking his knuckles. "But let us see how it sounds when played on your fine keys..." He ran fingers over the keys again, and smiled; then they began a swift dance, here to there, in an attempt to play a bright, swift tune, one that danced between both sides of the keyboard.

He was a tad rusty--a little slow. His instrument of choice, after all, was stringed; but the piano was still one that he knew.

When he finished--assuming, of course, The Piano let him finish--The Collector leaned back in his chair, and smiled thoughtfully. "Hmmm. I am a bit out of touch, but nonetheless... What do you think?"

Should The Piano allow the song to play through to the end, it can--if it so chooses--have learned the piano adaptation for Danse Macabre.

@The Piano

The Piano knew that its name was quite different from the words the Gembound were used to speaking. However, it had decided to give the Collector its name, rather than its alias, anyway. From the moment it set sight on the mysterious hooded being, it knew that this was not a simple Gembound, but a man of culture who could properly appreciate the arts and comprehend the sounds that pianos made. Indeed, he managed a rather admirable pronunciation of its name, and The Piano plucked a single singing note in appreciation.

When the Collector sat down to play his delightful little tune, The Piano easily forgave any small mistakes or hesitations in his playing. After all, it must not be often that one who resided in the barren Room of Bones came across a fine musical instrument like itself. It knew that all good things came with practice, and it was more than happy to provide this opportunity for the Collector to connect with his artistic side and fill Canis with this bright, mischievous melody.

"It was an honor to collaborate with you on this little performance," it spoke when the Collector had finished. "Nothing brings me greater joy than being able to use my full capabilities to fill a room with glorious music. In fact, that is why I am here today."

It lowered its lid to half stick once more, now that the performance was over and there was no pressing need to project its sound to its full ability. "My repertoire is very limited. I can only play what music I come up with on my own, but I must not be the only musically-minded being to have lived! Just now, you introduced that wonderful dance to me, one that I would not have learned on my own. I wish to expand my repertoire. To learn more great music to fill these caves with. Collector, I can tell that you are an artist in more than one way. You must have knowledge of more music out there, and connections to whatever musical geniuses there are! Will you help me with my musical endeavors?"

The Collector took a breath, leaning back. As The Piano spoke, he leaned one elbow on the arm of his char, propping up his jaw with his palm in a thoughtful expression.

"No exchange of mine is free," he began, "and so before I begin with this transaction--with offers and pricing--let me note that allowing me to play such beautiful music across your very form," (fingertips attempted to trail across a few keys) "-will have lowered the price that I will ask. What a wonderful gift, indeed, music. These caves haven't nearly enough of it. Say," and he sat forward--"perhaps you and I might play a duet, some time. My instrument of choice is perhaps rather more raw than your elegance, but I could make do, I think..."

He hummed, leaning back again. "As for music of your own... there are options. I can think of two; perhaps either might interest you, or if not, we can find another way. But firstly, there are undoubtedly many works within the Palace. You would need to only borrow them--or have copies made--but I might be able to offer you a way to more quickly learn to read this sheet music." His tone held almost enthusiasm, a thoughtful musing that was touched with excitement. Perhaps he truly did love music.

"Another way," he suggested, "would be for me to bring enchanted copies of myriad songs for you. But in that case I warn you, though you would understand them innately--no practice required--they might be touched by my own style. Ever-so-slightly," he added.

"Generally I require some object or service for my own. But we can discuss pricing if either of these appeal...?"

@The Piano

The Piano hummed in general agreement with the Collector's words. Yes, of course; simply giving things away for free was hardly a sustainable business practice. Otherwise, it could see how the Collector's collection of things would quickly diminish to nothing! How terrible that would be, if no Gembound in the future would be able to do business with him.

"A duet would be delightful," it replied to his suggestion eagerly. "Ah, but what is your instrument of choice? I would love to see it, if you are willing. I have not encountered any other Gembound, or even objects, designed for music in a different shape from myself." There was the lone piano in the Palace, of course, but they were both Pianos, and that somewhat reduced the novelty. "Either way, I could think of no greater pleasure than to play music together!" The tone of its notes striking even turned brighter, as if to reflect its enthusiasm.

"As for your offers..." The Piano paused to consider, but it had made its decision before long. "I will take the first option; simply tell me what you ask in exchange! I have long hungered to know the immense works of art that must be stored in all the music books in the Palace, but have never been able to read and access them! I could devote endless cycles to studying and appreciating them, if only I had the ability to read and learn the music from ink-marks on paper! And I could hardly come bother you for another enchanted work every time I wanted to learn a new song. But in the future, if you have not tired of my company, might I come to you with another trade? I would be curious, and happy, to learn what songs you have in your possession. It is my opinion that there is no better way to get to know a person than to truly understand their artistic tastes and personal style!" A shimmering arpeggio decorated the end of its sentence. Evidently, it was quite happy.

The Collector listened, and for a brief moment made as if to pull his instrument--a strange middle-ground, somewhere, between a guitar and an old banjo--from his robe. But he paused, head tilted, as The Piano went on.

His hand retracted, sans instrument, and he considered.

"...In return, I will place a charm beneath your hood--or elsewhere, if you prefer, but hidden. And three times, I will summon you, likely without warning. When I do," he pointed with dramatic intent toward The Piano, "you must play the most suspenseful, slow, dramatic music you have thus far learned. No speech or questions--simply arrive, recognize that I have summoned you, and play. For dramatic effect, obviously, and conversation would ruin that. After the third summon, I will speak with you and remove the charm and our deal will be considered complete. You will receive the item to allow you to read these texts in advance, of course. What do you say? ...Do we have a deal?"

Once the contract were sealed, he'd talk again of duets--but for now, business first, and all that.

@The Piano

The piano was perfectly still and silent as the Collector explained his price. Then, an odd... sound began to rise from its innards. With its dampers lifted, all its strings began to hum at once, as if someone had bypassed its keys and brushed their hand directly against the strings. The ringing sound grew louder and louder (though not nearly as cacophonic as its initial entrance into Canis had been), and the golden alien script on its side writhed and warped into increasingly horrific shapes. Several mellow, random-sounding keysmashes added new variety of sound and articulation into the all-encompassing, ringing haze of sound.

It appeared that The Piano was... laughing?

"We do," it cackled, several excitable keysmashes added into its speech making the contours of its words just barely understandable. "Ah, Collector, I can see we have many things in common... I wish you the best of luck in all your future business endeavors. Go ahead and place the charm!"

Very considerately, it propped its lid up to its full height to make it easier for the Collector to reach.

The Collector gave a short, good-natured-sounding laugh.

"Just a moment; we must first make this agreement official. All of my contracts are fully documented and must be signed, and--hmm. I will need a moment to pick that particular object from my collection. The Conductor, it is called--for it is both a link between the reader and their material, and then directs your music. It is a pun, you see." He paused, thinking. "It may be a little... unsteady at first, given how long it has been in storage, but nothing terribly out of sorts. Give me a few moments, and I will retrieve it--and the contract. I apologize for the delay."

The Collector turned, striding off into Canis, though he simply vanished some steps on. Should The Piano wait, he would return some twenty minutes later, striding down the trail and unfurling a long, curled parchment scroll covered in writing. "The usual clauses apply," was his greeting as he approached again. His eyes cut to the parchment. "Side effects may include shortness of breath, insomnia, sweat--wait. Wrong document." He squinted, shook the parchment, and with a sparkle of white light it seemed to change--growing a little shorter. "Ahh--here we are. Zero liability on seller's end for damage caused by misuse; object is to be reclaimed if and when purchaser exits this mortal coil; failure to complete purchaser's end of the bargain subject to repossession, etcetera, etcetera."

He knelt, swivelling the parchment to face The Piano--and indeed, a point at the bottom right had a large bare spot just suited for a Piano's wheel--or whatever else it might like to use to sign with. "It simply requires your touch to finalize, so... Just sign here."

@The Piano