When James had arrived, Madhukar's worry was pretty blatant. Scrawled all over her face like a vandalized bathroom wall. There was one person Madhukar had kept on meeting, kept on actively making herself care about in a positive way. She had done it so often -- cared about him, that is -- that it was almost like a habit or something. Usually that habit was fine, but recently it had been screwing with her head, and with the combination of Sunny's (entirely needless) capture and the new caves and just-- gah, everything...
Madhukar wasn't doing so hot. Yeah. No, that was pretty clear.
She didn't know it yet, she didn't really have the term for it, but Tahi was her best friend. So, when James arrived, Madhukar decided that she would put up with it... with the guilt. They started with a bang -- an understandable amount of anger. 'I hurt your kid, I actually chrysalized your-- your Tahi. Mine too. Among other things... like the Hunt. I deserve it, at this point.' Those were the thoughts indeed, but all that expressed them was an acknowledging grunt.
They could worry about punishment, among many other things, once they found him. "So... where woul' he be?" The feline was already trying to keep pace with this full grown horse. How own structure, her form, showing... something. Something bad. Her own ears pinned, her own head hanging low. Her own eyes averting James's gaze, looking around wildly as if she would spot a peeking antler or a tuft of a tail poking out behind a rock or a bone pile somewhere.
Madhukar was searching, but it felt like she, too, was lost somehow.
Think "Speak"
@James
The advantage of living a nomadic lifestyle was that it was easy to stay hidden. The disadvantage of having a nomadic lifestyle was that the caves were tiny and he didn't have anywhere comfortable to sleep. Being well hidden didn't work out too well when you had friends who cared about you -- or when you were currently asleep against a wall, in much the same position Madhukar had first found you in.
Tahi-shei had fallen asleep while he was meditating, whether because of exhaustion or being sufficiently relaxed. His chin rested on a stone he'd moved into place, his head adorned with the Crown, and with a squat, round-faced mushroom in front of his nose. He was oblivious to their presence, and actually blended in rather well with the bones and stone of Canis.
Madhukar watched as James tried, and failed, to look for Tahi. Didn't have it in her to laugh at the failure. Didn't have it in her to wince either. No compassion, no spite, just apathetic charge, buzzing in her brain. A battery on low power, doing its best to power a machine that desired to be a constant in the universe. Madhukar didn't want to succumb to entropy. She didn't want entropy to beat her... not when Tahi was gone. Not when someone still needed her.
As she slithered around bone piles and mounds, Madhukar's thoughts ate away at her. Despite her best efforts to keep them out, something in her had to hiss: 'Are you sure anybody needs you? You're fully grown but still so SCARED of yourself. And soon, everybody else is gonna be scared of you too.' Leave her alone. 'You don't want that.' Oh really? Why the heck not? 'Cause you're already being left by everyo--' Madhukar found a rock to sit on, and let out an exhausted huff.
It hadn't occurred to her that her designated seat might actually be the deer she was looking for. 'Tahi, where did you go? WHY did you go...?' Madhukar's heart faltered like a butterfly about to collapse from the effort of flight. Condensation, evaporation, something building in the air. Not yet to be released. Madhukar couldn't give up yet. "TAHI?" she called, uncharacteristically... it just didn't sound like herself. It wasn't quiet by any means, it just also wasn't... alive in the way that Madhukar was known for being.
'I'm running low on power and I don't know what to do, Tahi... please be here.'
Again, by this point, she was sitting on top of him. Like how they had first met. A sleeping Tahi was often comparable to rock -- you could mistake one for the other if you weren't aware of the key differences: life, and an overachieving mind in one, and not so much of either in the other.
Think "Speak"
@James
Much like his first meeting with Madhukar, sound in his ears jerked him awake and triggered his startle reflex. Black mushrooms sprang up around his throat as he leapt to his feet, looking around wildly for the threat -- then, wide-eyed and confused, he looked at James. And down at his feet, to Madhukar.
It felt remarkably like a stone had dropped into his stomach as dread set in. He'd been avoiding them on purpose -- the two most wonderful, bright, energetic, and lovable people he knew. But it wasn't as though he could run -- without really having meant to, they'd backed him into a corner. He took a half-step back and hit the wall, emphasizing such a thing. His mind raced for an explanation, for anything he could say -- James looked angry, Madhukar looked a little bit broken, and
oh, Caves. She thinks I'm mad at her, doesn't she...?
But instead of saying something wonderfully poetic or insightful or clever, he instead said,
"So, uh, you two've met?"
@james
@madhukar
And instead of answering his question, Madhukar would pose another. "Why?" The words stumbled out hollow-feeling, like some kind of anger wanted to be there: the threat of emotion imminent, and yet evasive.
Madhukar was now off the back of the deer, staring up at him from the lowly floor. The deer who slicked himself in black frills. 'What, is he SCARED of you or something?' The crows were laughing at her now, weren't they. Well that was fine, that should have been fine, because it shouldn't have mattered -- Tahi was here now! Safe! Not a scratch, right? See! Look at him! Look at-- look at that crown on his head... Madhukar, come on... why aren't you smiling?
Madhukar's eyes narrowed, training on that crown frozen solid to her best friend's head. "Why...?" Hollowness turned to confusion. Still no accusations, still no thunder in the sky. 'Where is that thing from? Why is he wearing it now? Why did he LEAVE?'
Think "Speak"
@James
He didn't have an answer for Madhukar, not the hollowness in her voice or in her eyes, and
Caves did that make his heart shatter, so instead he narrowed his eyes at James. He'd defend her, if nothing else.
"I've known her longer than I've known you, James. I'm sure she regrets anything she did to Comet -- but I wouldn't have wanted her to do things any differently at the raid. She fixed me, and now I'm better, and I'm grateful for her interference." Even if it had been more than a little bit traumatic
thatswhateliasfeltwhenyoukilledhim, he'd have done exactly the same thing in her same position.
He cringed away as they both started to interrogate him, and wished he had another step back to take. But they'd found him, and he couldn't hide forever. Especially not with Madhukar looking at him like that, or James inching away.
"I don't think it does anything violent," was the first thing he said, and his voice was somehow hollow. He sighed, and looked sadly down at Madhukar, and then began to speak. (Had he ever told either of them the full story...? He wasn't sure if he had.)
"I hatched in Orion," he began, eyes shifting off of her and onto the floor.
"The first creature I ever met was Pride, and I knew right away that I wanted to be at least as good at magic as he was." He laughed, a bitter sort of sound.
"I humiliated myself at the Olympics in front of him, and even though I knew more power would come with time--" Madhukar's hadn't. "Even though I knew it would come with time, I've never been very patient."
He looked aside.
"So I made a deal with the Collector. I changed my mind in the aftermath and Pride came with me to help sort it out, but I couldn't get out of my deal. He threatened me, and needed me to-- fulfill my end of the bargain." He scuffed the ground quietly.
"... He... needed the body of a Greater. One that hadn't decayed yet. A-And then, a-an acquaintance of mine was chrysalized by an alligator living in Canis and when I asked for an explanation he told me that the world was kill or be killed and that he'd do it again and so I just--"
Tahi-shei's breath came out in a shudder, and he found himself unable to complete the phrase.
They were both smart people.
They'd figure it out.
@madhukar
@james